The phone punctured my deep dreamless REM slumber at the crack of midnight. I flopped an arm out of the covers, groping for the instrument, 'Hello,’ I croaked.

'Hey dear what are you doing', a very cushy and exuberant vox came out of the instrument. It was one of my friends. I was agitated and said 'I'm making out over here, wanna join me'. He was like LOL and as he was verbalizing, on the spur of the moment, the ambience of my room turned deadening, spine-chilling and atrocious. My room has a huge window which will be shut most of the time. It is covered with beautiful drapes which flow down in a very elegant manner. The curtains started to flap and it was not a dime a dozen. I started to feel bizarre and my attention was hived off to the window. But couldn't incur anything fishy. Later on my heart started to throb. 'Hey dude shall babble stuff tomorrow', I said and hung up. Abruptly one little girl chuted into my room from the huge window, sat behind me and started scratching my neck. Somehow I could feel she was in deep anguish. But I didn't have the courage to swing around and gander at her as I was panic-stricken. But I managed to amass ample amount of courage and asked her, 'Who are you and why you are here?' Her sweet voice was debating with her vocal cord whether to come out or not. As she was stuttering, she said she wanted some help. I was more appalled and asked her to spill the beans.

'I am completely baffled. Donno what's happening with me and why things are happening this way. I feel like killing people whom I love the most. I feel I want more and more pain. For that I don't mind cutting myself and seeing my own blood. It’s better to hurt myself rather than hurting others', she said this and continued scratching my neck. But I felt terribly horrifying and didn't know what to do. I wanted to screech and fleer from there, but I felt crippled. Started to wonder “could I really lend a hand”. I didn't have the guts to ask her what help she wanted. So the whole night I just prayed and wanted to see the sun asap. From that day, I could sense her in my room every time I entered. After few days I agnized that the girl was my inner soul itself, no one else, which was hurt badly and couldn't convey things to anyone else. My room had become the only place where my soul could cry out loudly, laugh, play or do anything it desired. It always craved to be locked in my room and stay away from people. It wanted to be lonely always and loved being that way. I palpated that my inner soul has taken over me and I need to find a way out of it. But I am really still contending for control of myself. It gives me the creeps when I think about my soul being on edge and thinking in such a vicious fashion.


AKXAT said...

Its scarily real!!!

Anonymous said...

Wow man, this is really a sacry one..hmm..that to finding ur soul inside ur home is sumwat extra-ordinary..

keshava said...

dear sis,your narration of events have developed way good and I appreciate it.
As for as your loneliness, be a best friend for yourself and you would not feel it anymore,besides you can call me up any time. take care